Season 4, Episode 18 - "Fiddler On the Ropes"
The Girls decide to invest $3,000 in a certificate of deposit. Rose is tasked with going to the bank, but she's called in early for work, so she asks Sophia to go in her place. What does Sophia do with their money?
She "invests" their money in a middleweight prizefighter named Kid Pepe.
Dorothy: No, if you ask me, we are doing fine starting out slow, you know, going in on that certificate of deposit together. I mean, it's the simplest form of investment. An idiot couldn't screw it up. By the way, Rose, uh, what was the rate today for the CD at the bank?
Rose: I didn't go to the bank today, Dorothy. I was called in to work early, so I ask Sophia to go for it.
Dorothy: You let Ma leave the house with $3000 of our money?
Rose: What's wrong with that?
Dorothy: What's wrong!? Odds are, she'll probably come back with a handful of magic beans!
Blanche: Dorothy, just relax. Your mother is a responsible woman. She knows how long it took us to save that money. You can trust her.
Sophia: Don't get mad.
Dorothy: Ma, did you buy the CD today?
Sophia: Not exactly. I said don't get mad.
Rose: Sophia, what did you do with our money?
Sophia: I think you're going to be really impressed. I made a very shrewd deal with a guy I met at the bus stop. Now, I know it's a big responsibility to take care of one, but I bought a boxer.
Dorothy: You spent $3000 for a dog?
Sophia: He's no dog. He's a winner! Come on in, Pepe!
Dorothy: Wait a minute, Ma. You bought a prizefighter?
Sophia: It's a once-in-a-lifetime investment. A week from now, you're going to be kissing the ground I walk on.
Dorothy: Yeah, and you're going to be looking up at it from the other side.
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